12 Misconceptions About Queer Women I’d Like To Clean Up At This Time

As a queer lady, we listen to some foolish circumstances on a semi-regular basis. I am always thrilled to teach the genuinely interesting, provided that they truly are sincere, but many for the misconceptions rotating around queer ladies, lesbians, and bisexuals are rooted in lack of knowledge. Next time some body asks you a ludicrous question concerning your sex, refer them to this. It is a convenient guide to get at any time someone tries to decay an idiotic myth.

1. 
   No, making use of a dildo doesn’t mean queer women crave knob.
   
   We listen to this discussion so frequently which makes myself like to shove dildos in my own ears to make sure that I don’t have to hear it again. See, a dildo is certainly not like a penis, certainly not. Many are formed like penises, but that contains even more related to feminine physiology compared to the dick by itself. Queer women make use of dildos and vibrators for the very same explanation right women perform: they never have worn out, you’ll change the electric batteries as long as they would, and never have difficulty locating the clitoris.
2. 
   No, lesbians are not lesbians because we never met ideal man.
   
   Every queer girl I know has heard this insulting statement, especially the ladies who come in same-sex connections. Most of them, like me, spent the required time internet dating men. They never ever found the proper guy simply because they, just like me, were supposed to be searching for the right lady but they don’t realize it yet. Physically, We have no need to continue making love with guys merely to ensure “the right choice” is not out there someplace, waiting around for a lesbian to bone him.
3. 
   No, females hate ladies because a guy broke our minds.
   
   Women who come across different women desirable never achieve this because we can not get dudes or because we lost some guy or because a guy broke up with you. Liking women actually a consolation award, nor is it a choice. Often, a breakup can make a lady create her vision and realize she actually is unhappy, but a broken cardiovascular system never ever “turned” any person gay. Lose me with that, please.
4. 
   No, we aren’t queer as a result of sexual assault or rape.
   
   You can’t create some one want a same-sex connection. Intimate assault is damaging and perplexing, definitely, and I also point out that as a survivor. Quite a few women can be. What I experience had nothing in connection with my interest toward women, though. Never look for a scapegoat to explain out our very own sexuality. That is not gonna work.
5. 
   No, queer females you should never dislike guys.
   
   Do a little queer ladies dislike guys? Probably. Will it be because those women can be gay? Nope. The majority of lesbians and bisexual women are completely cool sharing the earth with the bros. Do not desire gender along with you, but that barely indicates we detest you. If that’s what you think, then issue most likely sits along with you.
6. 
   No, one of us is not “the man” together with various other one isn’t “the woman.”
   
   Which is some heteronormative BS right there. Two ladies in a connection don’t have to fall into similar parts as a traditional heterosexual couple. Hell, one and a woman in a relationship won’t need to belong to those groups, sometimes. They’re arbitrary and outdated. Two femme women tends to be in a relationship equally conveniently as two butch women, or among each. They may also proceed through phases. Exactly who realized?
7. 
   No, lesbians and bisexuals who like butch women are perhaps not directly.
   
   I’m butch, my wife wants myself, I am confident she’s not right. It really is an aesthetic, a mindset, an attitude. It isn’t really penis-envy. Women that like females and tend to be drawn to androgynous or masculine-presenting women however like females, you look?
8. 
   No, femme queer women can be perhaps not confused.
   
   The theory that
   feminine-presenting queer women
   are only perplexed or dealing with a period is actually absurd. Ways a woman outfits doesn’t have anything regarding her sex. Neither does this lady beauty products. Individuals are often amazed my wife is actually married to a female because she actually is incredibly girly, but that’s because she likes to use makeup products and carry out her tresses. She additionally loves boobs and vagina. Where’s the correlation?
9. 
   No, only a few queer ladies have actually father problems.
   
   Really don’t actually fully grasp this one, to be honest, but I’ve been expected, since has almost every other queer lady I’m sure. It can happen, however it doesn’t usually, once it can, the paternal problems have nothing regarding sexuality. If it had been the fact, I’d like men because dad is the bomb.
10. 
    No, the lesbians you should never lease U-Hauls on the 2nd dates.
    
    This option can be so ridiculous. It really is form of insulting, as well. We hold back until the 3rd go out. The 2nd big date is kepted for cutting all of our fingernails.
11. 
    No, not absolutely all queer women burn our very own bras.
    
    Frankly, not all of us identify as feminists or revolutionaries. Carry out many of us? You bet the sweet butt we carry out. However, to generally meet a queer girl and automatically assume that she is Gloria Steinem’s long-lost girl is just a lot of stereotyping bollocks.
12. 
    No, bisexual females do not want to have a threesome to you.
    
    What-is-it with individuals making the assumption that
    all bisexuals are into threesomes
    , anyhow? Bisexual women are not intimate extras. They cannot exist to meet a fantasy or improve your unfortunate, flagging love life. Get a grip.